So your soulmate finally popped the question – congratulations!! This is the start of one of the most exciting times of your life! You’ve been looking forward to this moment for what seems like forever, but now are you looking around blankly thinking, “Now what?!” Trust us, you’re definitely not alone in having no idea what to do after getting engaged.
Hi! We’re Susie and Jillian from Reverie Events and Weddings. And with our years of professional experience helping dozens of newly engaged couples navigate the wedding planning process, we’re able to offer some advice about what to do after getting engaged to get your wedding planning started on the right foot. Keep reading for our pro tips!
1. Enjoy the Moment!
This might seem cliché, but it’s so true – the first thing you should do after getting engaged is to stop and enjoy the moment! It can be really really tempting to dive right into wedding planning the moment you get engaged, but in case you haven’t heard, wedding planning can take a ton of time and energy and can be stressful and divisive. Before potentially opening up that Pandora’s Box, we recommend staying off Pinterest and The Knot for a few days or even a few weeks. Share the news with as many of your loved ones as possible in person, remain totally present with your new fiancé, go on a sweet date night to celebrate your engagement, and really soak in the excitement of being newly engaged and getting to spend forever with your soulmate.
This tip will also give you some time to look forward to your marriage and not just your wedding. You’ll only get to experience this post-proposal bliss once in your life – take some time to savor every moment of it!
2. Brainstorm Your Wedding Vision
Now that you’ve taken some time to bask in your new engagement glow, you’re probably ready to start dipping your toe into the wedding planning pool. But start slow! We love the idea of planning a quiet date night with your fiancé to have some uninterrupted time together to discuss your big-picture wedding ideals.
Will you have a local or destination wedding? Do you prefer spring, summer, fall, or winter? Do you want an indoor venue, outdoors, or a combination of the two? Will your wedding be casual and relaxed or fancy and formal? Do you want to keep your guest list small and intimate, or do you have a ‘the more the merrier’ attitude?
Once you’ve made some of these macro decisions together, you’ll have a clear picture of your perfect wedding in your head, and you will be able to make the rest of your choices based on that vision.
3. Start Thinking About Your Budget
Yikes, the dreaded budget conversation. We know how uncomfortable it may be to talk candidly about money with your new fiancé, your family, and your fiancé’s family, but trust us, every decision you make in your wedding planning will be so much easier for everyone if you’ve already had these conversations and know how much each party is willing to contribute to your big day. Whether your total budget is $15,000.00 or $150,000.00, you’ll be able to avoid tons of headaches and arguments by having that information in your back pocket from the very beginning of your planning.
Do your research about how much wedding venues and vendors in your area cost, reach out to a planner if you need help itemizing your budget, and keep your expectations realistic.
PRO TIP: Keep in mind that you don’t have to pay for your entire wedding right away. You’ll have to pay deposits to your venue and vendors upfront, but you may not have to make additional payments for several months to a year, which means you’ll have time to save. Make sure you know each venue and vendor’s payment policy so you’re prepared to make additional payments when the time comes.
4. Put Together a Preliminary Guest List
It might seem odd to start listing out your guests before even knowing your wedding date, but having a preliminary guest count from the get-go is really really helpful when you’re researching venues. All venues have a strict maximum guest capacity – some only hold 100 guests, some hold 200 guests, others can hold up to 300 or more. But it’s imperative that you have an idea of your guest count so you don’t waste time considering a venue that won’t fit everyone or is way over budget for the number of guests you’re expecting.
5. Start Researching Venues
The next thing to do after getting engaged is to start researching potential wedding venues. Now that you’ve already figured out your wedding vision and priorities, your budget, and your approximate guest count, you’ll definitely be able to narrow down your venue hunt until your find one that’s just perfect.
We always recommend starting your search online – you can use a simple Google search, The Knot, WeddingWire, local vendor guides, or social media to start finding ideas. Then you’ll contact your favorite venues directly for their pricing and availability or to set up in-person tours.
Finding the perfect venue can be a lot of work! If you’re overwhelmed, don’t hesitate to reach out to a planner for help.
6. Choose a Wedding Date
You may be surprised that choosing a wedding date doesn’t fall sooner on our list of things to do after getting engaged, especially since the first thing anyone ever asks a newly engaged person is, “Sooooo, have you picked a date yet?!” You have our permission to clue those people in that there’s A LOT to do before you can choose a wedding date (see above!!). Plus, until you sign a contract with a venue for a particular wedding date, nothing is really set in stone.
It’s helpful to go into venue tours with a preference of which season or month you’d like to tie the knot in, but you’ll have a much higher chance of securing your dream venue if you’re willing to work within their availability. Especially now that so many weddings have been postponed and couples are racing to secure a venue, it’s in your best interest to be flexible about your wedding date and make your final selection based upon which dates are still available at the venue you love. And keep an open mind to Friday or Sunday weddings!
If you’re absolutely dying to hire a particular photographer or live band or other wedding pro for your big day, it’s smart to reach out about their availability too before signing a venue’s contract for a particular date.
The hard part is over!! Now that you’ve secured your wedding date and venue and know your budget and guest count, the fun can really begin! Throw an engagement party, find inspiration on Pinterest and Instagram, hire a planner (we’re worth every penny wink wink), hire a team of talented wedding pros, take fun engagement photos, shop for your dream gown, order Save the Dates, choose your bridal party members, and more!
And don’t forget – ENJOY EVERY MOMENT!!
